DEFINING MOMENTS - A MESSAGE TO MY FAVORITE GIRLS SOCCER TEAM
I volunteered to be a youth soccer (AYSO) coach the second year (2001) my daughter played soccer. I was an assistant coach that year and in 2002 I decided to become a head coach. Since then, I have always been a head coach to all of my daughter's or son's regular season teams (13). I coach for many reasons, but the main reason I coach youth sports is because it allows me to bond and communicate my philosophy of sports and life to my children and other children.
My daughter no longer plays soccer. She gave up soccer after playing it in her freshman year of high school to try basketball. She had an outstanding year as a member of her school's JV team, and if she decides to play next year, can be a valuable interior player on the varsity. The sport that she loves is volleyball and she is currently training with a club volleyball team. Soccer was her primary sport as a youth. When parents ask me what's the first team sport their child should do, I recommend soccer. Soccer is an easy sport for a child to grasp and play. Article on "Why Soccer is Good for Kids" does a good job of summing up soccer's benefits.
Over the years, I've grown as a soccer and youth coach. I have a core mission statement and philosophy that I introduce to every team that I coach. The mission statement is simple: "Play Hard, Play Smart, Play Together and have fun doing so." The team motto is "All for One; One for All."
I view the athletic fields as my classroom. I've told parents that their child will learn as much in my classroom as they will in school. Coaches at all levels should try to impact or develop five skills: Athletic, Technical, Tactical, Psychological and Social. The missing component in most youth programs is the psychological. I address this in a variety of ways. With my BU12 soccer team, I do a quote of the week. I will share more about this in a future blog. Starting with my daughter's first U12 team, I decided to teach John Wooden's Pyramid of Success Philosophy. I taught 4 teams Wooden's Pyramid, that's approximately 50 girls. While I was teaching them, I was also teaching their parents. The response from the parents was overwhelming. One mother introduced Wooden's philosophy to her workplace; a father had weekly family meetings to discuss the information that I was sharing with them. I could tell you countless other stories, but that's not the purpose of this blog. If you ever decide to teach John Wooden's Pyramid of Success Philosophy, I highly recommend two books: "Coach Wooden's Pyramid of Success: Building Blocks For a Better Life" and "Wooden on Leadership: How to Create a Winning Organization."
In 2007 I coached my favorite girls team. This year I had the opportunity to coach my favorite boys team. All my teams are special to me, but both of these teams have a special place in my heart. My favorite girls team was a talented and spirited group. I wrote this letter to them in 2007 before our semi-final game against the best team in our league. We had lost to them 6-1 (two of my best players missed that game - It's the Jane's and the Jill's, not the X's and the O's) earlier in the season. Without further adieu, I present you
Unicorns United,
What an appropriate name for our team. "The unicorn is a legendary creature. The unicorn is the only fabulous beast that does not seem to have been conceived out of human fears. She is fierce,yet good,selfless yet solitary, but always mysteriously beautiful. She could only be captured by unfair means, and her single horn was said to neutralize poison." The United part of our name cuts to the heart of our team motto - All for One; One for All. We've been in this together from the beginning of the year. We've made great strides and are ready to give our best effort in tomorrow's game.
I'm writing this note to you because I want you to think only positive thoughts about our game - To focus on the moment,not the past. Yes, the Mustangs won all 7 games they played. They scored 28 goals and only gave up 2 goals. They beat us 6-1 and dominated the flow of the game. One of their players later told one of our players that they even pulled back in the second half. All that said, this game for us is not about the Mustangs, but about us focusing on being the best that we can be. Guess What - we're pretty good. The Unicorns are the most talented team that I have ever coached. Trust me - if we come with the right attitude and mindset; they will not be pulling back in this game. They will be on their heels.
I titled this note DEFINING MOMENTS. Defining moments come about throughout our lifetime. They let us know how much we have evolved, what we are capable of doing and what we need to do to get better. It can be a test, a game, a performance, a speech, etc. Some dread these moments, some embrace them. Ladies - this game is a defining moment in your young lives. You might not remember this game 10 years from now, but it's a challenge that can help shape you in the years to come. This is the one team that I wanted us to play again. A true competitor wants to go up against the best. Your responsibility is to bring your best attitude and effort to the field on Thursday Night. No matter what happens in the game, you must make up your mind now that you will remain mentally strong and keep giving your all. You know from my talk at our team party that you play with your mind, body and heart. All are important, but the most important is your heart. Playing with heart means that you don't play scared and you play with passion and courage. Embrace this opportunity. Do not let it consume you. Most importantly, believe in yourself and your teammates. Encourage one another and keep on chopping wood.
I want no whining, complaining or excuses about anything. It will be cold. You can wear anything under your uniform that you desire. I don't want to hear one word about it being cold. Being cold is a "state of mind". Get your mind ready to deal with the elements. Think about the position(s) that you play on the field. Visualize yourself doing positive things in the game - Think positive thoughts about scoring a goal, making a great pass, delivering a great kick to start our attack, diving to save a goal, stealing the ball from a defender, getting in position to make a play, closing out hard on the ball when they are in our defensive third, layering up defensively to be the second or third defender, etc.
I sent you Wooden's chapter on the final block - Competitive Greatness. In this chapter he had six type written statements on Game Competition. Here they are:
1. Have courage and do not worry. If you do your best, never lose your temper, and never be out-fought or out-hustled, you have nothing to worry about. Without faith and courage you are lost.
2. Have respect without fear for every opponent and confidence without cockiness in regards to yourself.
3. Think all of the time. Study your opponent and yourself all of the time for the purpose of increasing your effectiveness and diminishing his.
4. Never be a spectator while in the game. Be doing something at all times, even if it is only being a decoy.
5. Team Work is essential. Unselfish team play and team spirit is one of the foremost essentials for success when any group are working together.
6. Be at your best when your best is needed. Enjoy the thrill from a tough battle.
Read the above 6 statements a couple of times. Internalize these statements and make it a part of who you are as a team player.
We will be making a few strategic adjustments for the game. We have played with four full backs the entire year. I'm adding a 5th defender for this game. We will have a back sweeper and four full backs When we are in our attacking 3rd. I will designate one girl (Inside right fullback) to be our front stopper/sweeper. The sweeper should act as a second goalie. No chasing balls around the sideline when we are in our defensive 3rd. Olivia will start our as our back sweeper and Lily, Bianca and Victoria may play this position at some point during the game. We will have two mid-fielders, one attacking mid-fielder and two forwards.
I may designate one player at some point in the game to mark one of their players.
I'm looking forwarding to seeing our Unicorns on Thursday. It shall be a fun time.
Think positive thoughts and just keep on chopping.chopping.
Clarence Gaines
P.S. How did we do? We lost. Got down 2-0; battled back to tie it at 2-2. Other team scored with 5 minutes to go and won 3-2. Never felt better about a loss. The girls had given their all and had done their best. They had internalized my lessons. I was one proud coach.
Over the years, I've grown as a soccer and youth coach. I have a core mission statement and philosophy that I introduce to every team that I coach. The mission statement is simple: "Play Hard, Play Smart, Play Together and have fun doing so." The team motto is "All for One; One for All."
I view the athletic fields as my classroom. I've told parents that their child will learn as much in my classroom as they will in school. Coaches at all levels should try to impact or develop five skills: Athletic, Technical, Tactical, Psychological and Social. The missing component in most youth programs is the psychological. I address this in a variety of ways. With my BU12 soccer team, I do a quote of the week. I will share more about this in a future blog. Starting with my daughter's first U12 team, I decided to teach John Wooden's Pyramid of Success Philosophy. I taught 4 teams Wooden's Pyramid, that's approximately 50 girls. While I was teaching them, I was also teaching their parents. The response from the parents was overwhelming. One mother introduced Wooden's philosophy to her workplace; a father had weekly family meetings to discuss the information that I was sharing with them. I could tell you countless other stories, but that's not the purpose of this blog. If you ever decide to teach John Wooden's Pyramid of Success Philosophy, I highly recommend two books: "Coach Wooden's Pyramid of Success: Building Blocks For a Better Life" and "Wooden on Leadership: How to Create a Winning Organization."
In 2007 I coached my favorite girls team. This year I had the opportunity to coach my favorite boys team. All my teams are special to me, but both of these teams have a special place in my heart. My favorite girls team was a talented and spirited group. I wrote this letter to them in 2007 before our semi-final game against the best team in our league. We had lost to them 6-1 (two of my best players missed that game - It's the Jane's and the Jill's, not the X's and the O's) earlier in the season. Without further adieu, I present you
DEFINING MOMENTS
: Unicorns United,
What an appropriate name for our team. "The unicorn is a legendary creature. The unicorn is the only fabulous beast that does not seem to have been conceived out of human fears. She is fierce,yet good,selfless yet solitary, but always mysteriously beautiful. She could only be captured by unfair means, and her single horn was said to neutralize poison." The United part of our name cuts to the heart of our team motto - All for One; One for All. We've been in this together from the beginning of the year. We've made great strides and are ready to give our best effort in tomorrow's game.
I'm writing this note to you because I want you to think only positive thoughts about our game - To focus on the moment,not the past. Yes, the Mustangs won all 7 games they played. They scored 28 goals and only gave up 2 goals. They beat us 6-1 and dominated the flow of the game. One of their players later told one of our players that they even pulled back in the second half. All that said, this game for us is not about the Mustangs, but about us focusing on being the best that we can be. Guess What - we're pretty good. The Unicorns are the most talented team that I have ever coached. Trust me - if we come with the right attitude and mindset; they will not be pulling back in this game. They will be on their heels.
I titled this note DEFINING MOMENTS. Defining moments come about throughout our lifetime. They let us know how much we have evolved, what we are capable of doing and what we need to do to get better. It can be a test, a game, a performance, a speech, etc. Some dread these moments, some embrace them. Ladies - this game is a defining moment in your young lives. You might not remember this game 10 years from now, but it's a challenge that can help shape you in the years to come. This is the one team that I wanted us to play again. A true competitor wants to go up against the best. Your responsibility is to bring your best attitude and effort to the field on Thursday Night. No matter what happens in the game, you must make up your mind now that you will remain mentally strong and keep giving your all. You know from my talk at our team party that you play with your mind, body and heart. All are important, but the most important is your heart. Playing with heart means that you don't play scared and you play with passion and courage. Embrace this opportunity. Do not let it consume you. Most importantly, believe in yourself and your teammates. Encourage one another and keep on chopping wood.
I want no whining, complaining or excuses about anything. It will be cold. You can wear anything under your uniform that you desire. I don't want to hear one word about it being cold. Being cold is a "state of mind". Get your mind ready to deal with the elements. Think about the position(s) that you play on the field. Visualize yourself doing positive things in the game - Think positive thoughts about scoring a goal, making a great pass, delivering a great kick to start our attack, diving to save a goal, stealing the ball from a defender, getting in position to make a play, closing out hard on the ball when they are in our defensive third, layering up defensively to be the second or third defender, etc.
I sent you Wooden's chapter on the final block - Competitive Greatness. In this chapter he had six type written statements on Game Competition. Here they are:
1. Have courage and do not worry. If you do your best, never lose your temper, and never be out-fought or out-hustled, you have nothing to worry about. Without faith and courage you are lost.
2. Have respect without fear for every opponent and confidence without cockiness in regards to yourself.
3. Think all of the time. Study your opponent and yourself all of the time for the purpose of increasing your effectiveness and diminishing his.
4. Never be a spectator while in the game. Be doing something at all times, even if it is only being a decoy.
5. Team Work is essential. Unselfish team play and team spirit is one of the foremost essentials for success when any group are working together.
6. Be at your best when your best is needed. Enjoy the thrill from a tough battle.
Read the above 6 statements a couple of times. Internalize these statements and make it a part of who you are as a team player.
We will be making a few strategic adjustments for the game. We have played with four full backs the entire year. I'm adding a 5th defender for this game. We will have a back sweeper and four full backs When we are in our attacking 3rd. I will designate one girl (Inside right fullback) to be our front stopper/sweeper. The sweeper should act as a second goalie. No chasing balls around the sideline when we are in our defensive 3rd. Olivia will start our as our back sweeper and Lily, Bianca and Victoria may play this position at some point during the game. We will have two mid-fielders, one attacking mid-fielder and two forwards.
I may designate one player at some point in the game to mark one of their players.
I'm looking forwarding to seeing our Unicorns on Thursday. It shall be a fun time.
Think positive thoughts and just keep on chopping.chopping.
Clarence Gaines
P.S. How did we do? We lost. Got down 2-0; battled back to tie it at 2-2. Other team scored with 5 minutes to go and won 3-2. Never felt better about a loss. The girls had given their all and had done their best. They had internalized my lessons. I was one proud coach.
You were right Clarance - You said that I would like this post. I do. I wish that there are more coaches like you.
ReplyDeleteIt is a nice article and very well written.. pasadenasoccer.com promotes a healthy youth-soccer environment that enables each player to fulfill their potential on the field. We encourage kids soccer Pasadena to make their passion turn into career
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